The Missing Pieces

So I mentioned in the last post that Kaitlyn was having potty issues at night for about a week or so off and on... Well I think I may have found out WHY!

A little back story: At church they have this cloth ABC Train zip-up book-like thing. Inside are little cloth stuffed animals with letters on the back of them. Each of them goes in the matching letter car on the train. Well, it used to be downstairs with all the other toys in the play area. Somehow it ended up upstairs in the back of the church where there are coloring books and puzzles and quiet toys for the kids to keep busy while we enjoy service.

Well, on Sunday 1/10/10 Kaitlyn found that this toy had made its way upstairs and she was playing with it and putting all of the letters in their correct train cars. She (and I, just from watching her play with it) noticed that there were two animals missing from the train. They were all there when it was downstairs!! So she didn't mention it but I saw her looking through the bins and all over to try to find the missing letters. She didn't find them... she still never mentioned it but I knew it was kinda bugging her a little(and ME! but I didn't say or do anything of course). Then this past Sunday she was REALLY looking for the two missing letters and I knew it was really getting to her that she couldn't find them but it's not something she openly discussed so I thought once we left church it was something she forgot about. Ya know... I thought it bugged her at the moment of playing with it but once it was out of sight, you wouldn't think of it.

Apparently, for Kaitlyn, this is not true! She has been carrying this around for a week and a half!!! It has been eating away at her and last night she had a nightmare about it! Last night at almost 11pm I heard Kaitlyn upstairs crying and yelling out "Stop!, Stop!" and she wasn't calming down so I knew it was time for me to go up and see if it was a nightmare or night terror and try to help calm her. Well this is when she told me she had a bad dream about looking for the missing letters for the ABC Train at church. She said she looked every where for them, she looked in both bins upstairs and they weren't there. She was telling me this all while crying and very upset. This afternoon she told me why it was so scary. She said in her dream she was at church looking all around for the letters and when she looked up everyone was gone and she was alone at church and that was what scared her. I calmed her and told her that this Sunday I would help her look downstairs for the missing letters and not to worry about it. I then asked her why she was holding her head and yelling stop. She told me "to make it stop" I asked "to make what stop? your head?" She then got visibly upset and said "yes, 'cause it's going all crazy" and she waved her hands around her head. So I reassured her that we would look for the missing letters this Sunday and to try to get back to sleep. She did.

I truly believe that this is the reason she has been acting out more the past week and a half, the reason why she has been having bathroom issues at night. Her anxiety must have been heightened this past Sunday from seeing/playing with the toy and perhaps that is why she has been getting stuck in her dog character the since Sunday? Could this be why she has been acting out even more and having tantrums the past few days? It seems to me that it is... that she has been carrying this weight around with her all this time and that those missing pieces are bothering her so much because it's not complete, it's not perfect, or whole. I know that feeling... I will throw puzzles away if they are missing pieces for a long time because I can't stand them being with the other puzzles. I absolutely HATE when toys are missing pieces, it drives me bonkers... I just wonder if she is feeling that because of her OCD tendencies and preference of order, perfection...

Again, thing that make you go, Hmm?

We're off this afternoon for a drive down to the Developmental Pediatricians office in Woodstock, NY. I'll try to update how that appointment goes soon.